President Trump Holds First Fake News Awards

Michael Geiger

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My mom, despite leaning right on most issues, thinks Donald Trump is about as off-putting a character as she’s ever seen. His personality runs so antithetical to her’s that there was never any chance she’d join the Trump Train. However, when Trump tweeted on January 7th that he would be postponing the Fake News Awards to a later date, my mom said to me, “You know, even though I think Trump’s usually an idiot, I’m actually a little disappointed that he’s moving the awards back. I was kind of looking forward to them.”

This remark captured the essence of the Trump brand’s power. Despite any misgivings held about the president by the public, we still hang on his every word. With this incredible influence, Trump has been able to shed a bright light on important issues of his agenda. This was best exemplified by his public support of the March for Life, a movement which remains shockingly under-covered by most media outlets. The power of social media allows Trump to subvert the usual avenues of spreading his message.

Despite the inherently comical nature of “The Highly-Anticipated 2017 Fake News Awards”, they were the perfect manifestation of Trump at his best. They displayed his usual bravado while remaining on target, hitting on some of the most egregious reporting of 2017. While I expected a drawn-out list, it was surprisingly concise. Only eleven stories were mentioned, along with a list of ten of Trump’s greatest achievements as president thus far. 

The eleven “winners” can be separated into three categories: 

Deplorable

  • ABC’s Brian Ross CHOKES and sends markets in a downward spiral with false report.

This report was definitely The Godfather of the Fake News Awards, as it featured an enthralling, albeit fictional story with a standout performance by a strange leading man. However, while The Godfather will live on as the greatest movie in history, Brian Ross’ career will likely suffer the same fate Luca Brasi did. 

  • CNN FALSELY reported about Anthony Scaramucci’s meeting with a Russian, but retracted it due to a “significant breakdown in process.”
  • “RUSSIA COLLUSION!” Russian collusion is perhaps the greatest hoax perpetrated on the American people. THERE IS NO COLLUSION!

The two Russia-related winners also earned their spot in the top tier, despite the second one not actually being a real story. Just remember: if there were any real proof to the idea that Trump has/had illegal ties to the Russians, it would be leading every CNN/MSNBC broadcast until the day Trump left office. 

Not Good!

  • CNN FALSELY reported that former FBI Director James Comey would dispute President Trump’s claim that he was told he is not under investigation.
  • CNN FALSELY reported that candidate Donald Trump and his son Donald J. Trump, Jr. had access to hacked documents from WikiLeaks.

The hits keep coming for CNN, as they could only offer two weak-tea corrections to these articles after they were instantly lambasted.

  • The New York Times’ Paul Krugman claimed on the day of President Trump’s historic, landslide victory that the economy would never recover.

Safe to say this take didn’t age well. Also, shout-out to Trump for once again referring to an election in which he lost the popular vote a “landslide victory.” The New York Times FALSELY claimed on the front page that the Trump administration had hidden a climate report.

In August, the New York Times claimed to have a draft report written by thirteen federal agencies concluding that America is already feeling the effects of climate change. The article also expressed fear that President Trump would dismiss the findings. The story neglected to mention that the climate report had been public for seven months. Ouch.

Lousy, but Petty

  • TIME FALSELY reported that President Trump removed a bust of Martin Luther King, Jr. from the Oval Office.
  • Washington Post FALSELY reported the President’s massive sold-out rally in Pensacola, Florida was empty. Dishonest reporter showed picture of empty arena HOURS before crowd started pouring in.
  • CNN FALSELY edited a video to make it appear President Trump defiantly overfed fish during a visit with the Japanese prime minister. Japanese prime minister actually led the way with the feeding.
  • Newsweek FALSELY reported that Polish First Lady Agata Kornhauser-Duda did not shake President Trump’s hand.

The greatness of the Fake News Awards are found in this section. Yes, the reporting here is still shoddy, but the fact that Trump felt that they were four of the worst eleven media stories of the year is just A1 trolling. 

Despite lacking the pomp and circumstance that was expected from Trump, these awards still delivered. There’s definitely room for improvement, but from the looks of the current democratic party, Trump will get seven more chances to build on the solid inaugural Fake News Awards.