It’s called the Green New Deal because I believe Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was high off the green when she wrote it. Let us admit that she is probably a little intoxicated whenever she opens her mouth.

Rep. Ocasio-Cortez is a colossal idiot. Let’s begin with her most recent bull.

“Wells Fargo is financing the caging of children,” was Ocasio-Cortez’s most recent allegation towards CEO Tim Sloan in a hearing on Mar. 12. You mean to say America’s #26 ranked Fortune 500, based out of liberal California is using their $86.4 billion in revenues to cage tiny, little, victimized children? Well, I’ll be damned, I wish I knew what Rep. Ocasio-Cortez was smoking when she came up with that one.

The hearing, which was brought upon Sloan by House Financial Services Committee Chairman Maxine Waters, D-Calif. was to look into fraudulent misconduct by Fargo’s employees. But as in tradition, our self proclaimed Democratic-Socialist wanted to take it a step further.

Is this a media ploy?

Cortez’s allegations continues, “You were financing, involved in debt financing in CoreCivic and GEO Group, correct?”

She is referencing the companies that manage private detention and rehabilitation facilities, which is right on key with her belief that financers should have to pay. It is comparable to saying if I loaned my friend $24 to get gas, and they ended up robbing the gas station, that I then, should be liable. There’s just no way to wrap your head around this idiocy.

In a statement to Fox News, a CoreCivic spokesperson rejected this claim, “We don’t provide housing for any children who aren’t under the supervision of a parent, we also don’t operate shelters for unaccompanied minors, nor do we operate border patrol facilities. Any assertions to the contrary are patently false and misinformed.”

Cortez then continued to state that Fargo should bear financial liability for oil spills and climate change for who they made loans to in the oil industry. Brilliant. Inspired.

Let us go back to the Green New Deal, specifically her beautiful economic stimulus programs.

“The world is going to end in 12 years if we don’t address climate change, and your biggest issue is how are we gonna pay for it?” said Cortez. 

In a FAQ sheet provided to media outlets by Cortez’s campaign, for the Green New Deal, there was a line that promised financial and economic security to people even if they did not want to work. If we could only be so lucky.

It gets better and funnier. She wants to create high-wage jobs. Last year, she took on the effort of dispelling Amazon’s plan of a new HQ in Queens, promising 25,000 jobs and a $2.5 billion investment to the area. Her argument? It wouldn’t give jobs to New York resudents… even though the Green Deal promised jobs to all Americans.

On the topic of the Deal, she even highlights getting rid of emissions, building transcontinental light rail systems and more. As she refuses to use the subway system 138 ft. from her headquarters, and instead tramps around in big, gas guzzling SUVs.

This has to be the most discombobulated article I have written. In essence, I cannot even wrap my head around it. There is more to be said, but I am going to cut it before I jump down that wormhole and lose some brain cells. Ocasio-Cortez has accomplished something. In all of my journalistic career I have never met something that was too stupid to even write a satire piece on.